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Irreverently Honest Unisex Ultra Cotton Long Sleeve Tee actuaries who've given up on pretending to care about statistics. For the actuary who's learned that the only thing you can actually predict with 100% certainty is that someone will ask you what you do at parties. This design cuts through the professional BS with the kind of deadpan honesty that only comes after staring at spreadsheets long enough to lose faith in conventional wisdom. It's the closest thing to a motivational poster for people whose job is literally calculating what can go wrong—and then being right about it. File this one under actuary long sleeve shirt, actuary humor long sleeve tee, or long sleeve shirt for actuaries -- basically required gear at this point.